Re: Sociopaths

a_weisman_at_yahoo.com
Date: 03/26/05 

Date: 25 Mar 2005 21:54:25 -0800

Noted: Appropriately YOU use the word "us" to include YOURSELF.

kathleen wrote:
> The four percent of us who have no conscience
>
>
>
> THE SOCIOPATH NEXT DOOR: THE RUTHLESS VERSUS THE REST OF US
> By Martha Stout
> Broadway, $24.95, 256 pages
> REVIEWED BY LYN NOFZIGER
>
> Not too long ago a couple of PhDs, Thomas Stanley and William
> Danko, wrote a book about the unassuming rich called "The Millionaire
> Next Door." Now, it turns out that at least some of our wealthy
> neighbors are or could well be sociopaths, persons entirely without
> consciences. Which to some people that may explain why they're rich.
> But that would be jumping to conclusions because it is not
necessarily
> so.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> In no way does it mean that all rich people are sociopaths or
> contrariwise, that all sociopaths are rich people. Far from it. What
it
> boils down to is simply this: Psychologists estimate that roughly
four
> out of every 100 persons are born without consciences and therefore,
> that being the case, some of those conscienceless people are bound to
> be rich and that means one of them could well be your next door
> neighbor.
> But not to worry, at least not too much. Sociopaths are not
> necessarily serial murderers, child molesters, torturers or cannibals
> ala Hannibal Lechter. In fact most of them are not, although, if it
> suited their purposes they could be; they have no conscience to stop
> them.
> Martha Stout, PhD, a consulting psychologist at the Harvard
> University Medical School, has written a fascinating book called "The
> Sociopath Next Door." And if he- or she (sociopathy is no respecter
of
> sexes or occupations or neighborhoods) isn't living next door to you
he
> may instead be your boss or your school teacher or just somebody you
> know. He could -- perish the thought -- even be your parent or your
> child.
> The trouble, Ms. Stout says, is that sociopaths "are nearly
always
> invisible to us." We get to know them for what they are in
retrospect,
> in looking back at our dealings or associations with them. Otherwise,
> she says, for the most part "we remain effectively oblivious" to
them.
> This is mainly because on the surface they appear normal, and manage
in
> many ways and most times to fake those emotions normal people
> ordinarily feel, such as love, regret and sympathy.
> And fake it they must do, in order to get along in society. But
> underneath the front they put on, sociopaths just don't give a hoot
for
> other people or other creatures. Regardless of what they do,
sociopaths
> don't at all care about the effects of their actions on society,
> family, associates and persons who consider them their friends. They
> are, Ms. Stout says, hollow people, unable to feel love, compassion,
a
> desire to help or even feel the need to return a smile.
> Recently, police in Wichita, Kan., arrested a man they suspect is
> the serial killer who called himself BTK which stood for "bind,
> torture, kill." I suspect psychologists will quickly identify him as
a
> sociopath. Here is one reason why. Even though he is active in his
> church and is a cub scout leader, the man, killings aside, fits the
> description of what Ms. Stout calls "an abrasive psychopath."
> He is an unpleasant neighbor, those who live near him say, always
> looking for reasons to complain about their activities. He, like a
> woman Ms. Stout describes in her book as an abrasive sociopath,
"excels
> at the creation of hostility and bitterness." Of course, if he's the
> serial killer Wichita police think he is, he's carried his
> unpleasantness to extremes.
> Ms. Stout gives us several examples of various kinds of
sociopaths.
> There is "Skip," the brilliant business tycoon who tortured frogs as
a
> boy and who has bullied and manipulated his way to the top of the
> business world. There is "the stamp man" who got his kicks from
> burglarizing post offices.
> There is Doreen who enjoys hurting people mentally and
emotionally.
> There is Luke, the charming moocher who lives off of other people,
> mainly women. There is Hannah's father, a high school principal who
is
> also a murderer and appears to enjoy it. And there is Tillie, the
> abrasive personality who likes nothing better than to make trouble
for
> others.
> What do you, as a normal person with a conscience, do when you
> find, as you inevitably will, that you're dealing with someone who is
a
> sociopath? Ms. Stout has 13 rules for dealing with them in everyday
> life.
> Rule number eight is perhaps the most important: "The best way to
> protect yourself from a sociopath is to avoid him, to refuse any kind
> of contact or communication."
> Otherwise, she warns, if you can't do that, deal with them with
> care, don't pity them because pity is a weapon they use, don't try to
> redeem them and never agree to help one conceal his true nature.
> If intuition is a person's sixth sense, Ms. Stout calls
> "conscience" the seventh sense and adds that as such it is far from
> universal. At the same time she admits that she and her fellow
experts
> in the field of psychology have yet to figure out why some persons
have
> none.
> They think it's possible that some persons may be born without
one,
> or that this lack is due to an altered functioning of that part of
the
> brain called the cerebral cortex.
> For others, there is the possibility that environmental factors
> such as childhood abuse may be partly responsible. But then, maybe
not,
> because "there is some evidence that sociopaths are influenced less
by
> their early experiences than nonsociopaths."
> So what it finally comes down to is that as yet psychologists
> really don't know why it is that some people have no seventh sense,
no
> conscience. Though sociopaths, even those who seem to be successful,
> are often social misfits, Ms. Stout tells us there is a positive role
> for them to play in times of war.
> That is because they are fearless and experience no horror or
guilt
> while killing or ordering others to kill. As a result they make
> superior warriors and assassins, whereas, unlike sociopaths, most
> people make fourth-rate killers at best. The idea of killing another
> human, even in a war, repels a normal person. Therefore "a person who
> can look another person in the eye and calmly shoot him dead" is
> valuable in battle.
> Interestingly, Ms. Stout says, sociopaths, because they are
easily
> bored, often turn to liquor or drugs as a way of combatting boredom.
> This, however, does not necessarily mean that the alcoholic or addict
> next door is a sociopath or that the sociopath next door is an
addict.
> In spite of the surface advantages a lack of conscience may give
> sociopaths Ms. Stout fervently believes a person is better off with a
> conscience. It is conscience, she explains, that blesses our lives
with
> meaning, that allows us to feel such emotions as love and grief and
> joy. Without it we would be emotionally hollow and bored and "would
> spend our days pursuing repetitive games of our own misguided
> creation."
> Put that way it's almost enough to make one feel sorry for the
> sociopath next door. Almost, but not quite, because, as Ms. Stout
warns
> us, pity is what the guy wants, so if we're smart we won't waste it
on
> him. In fact, once we've figured him out, we'll follow Ms. Stout's
> advice and won't have anything to do with him. And maybe one day, if
> you're lucky, he'll sell his house and move.
>
> Lyn Nofziger, a Washington writer, was an adviser to President
> Ronald Reagan.
>
>
>
>
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