Re: OT: when a child refuses to go to sleep
From: Maureen Galvin (maureen.galvin_at_comcast.dot.net)
Date: 01/14/05
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Date: Fri, 14 Jan 2005 12:11:11 -0600
My youngest would never take real naps. Part of the problem was because
when she was born, I already had two very active kids ages 5 and 9 that I
needed to shuttle around and blocking out a solid couple of hours for naps
was just not possible. She did sleep well in her carrier, but if she got
more than an hour nap she was up way to late at night. She did better on
just a half hour nap.
She is and always was a night owl like me. I did the bulk of my work at
night because that is when I was the most uninterrupted. So, for the most
part she never went to bed before 10:00 PM and would be awake and happy by
the time it was time to take my oldest to school at 7:45. We would come
home, she would and my middle daughter would eat and then I would take my
middle daughter 4 days a week to her preschool/tumbling classes at the Park
at about 11:30. By 2:00 it was time to pick up the oldest and then pick up
my middle daughter.
As she got older and my oldest got older and could walk to school with his
friends, she began to fall asleep earlier on her own, but naps were still an
issue. When I returned to a day job for a while, she still would not take
naps in daycare. They tried, but in the end the found it was best to just
separate her from the others and she had "quiet" time without disturbing the
others who did need naps.
As far as her mother is concerned, I'm sure she is overwhelmed. It is very
difficult to be a single mother and always be the bad guy, but she really
does need to get a handle on things.
A trick my SIL had used on her kids who didn't like bedtime was to calm them
all down before bedtime. She would turn off all the lights in the house,
have them all get their pillows (she had 3 kids under the age of 6 when her
DH moved out which caused a lot of stress and turmoil) and their blankies.
She would pop a video into the VCR and turn the sound down really low. The
kids all had to lay down with their heads on their pillows and watch the
movie. The part of laying down and having to look up at the TV and strain
to hear the movie usually had them asleep in 20 minutes. She would do her
dinner clean up and folding laundry while they were doing this. Is it
perfect, no but it did work.
This became their "routine" and it worked for them. Bedtime is not the time
for screaming battles especially because some kids get so worked up over
this that they are then unable to calm down and go to sleep.
Jeannie may be right that she is just looking for some time with her mom.
If that is the case, then maybe mom should just turn off the TV and spend
some quiet time with her so she can wind down until they find a quiet
routine and time for bed that works for them.
Maureen
"Su" <.@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:FcLFd.38176$zy6.18132@bignews5.bellsouth.net...
> The bulk of what you said is being forwarded to my daughter, but what
> about this ...
>
> "JulieW8" <seemysig@netscape.net> wrote in message
> news:41e6ac8c.13325901@News.individual.net...
>> You have to keep an active kid active and make sure they're darn tired
>> by the end of the day. That means no naps.
>
> She's in daycare, and *all* of the kids are required to take naps. If she
> doesn't, she can get extremely irritable (I've seen it, but so did my
> kids). What then? What if they say, "Nap time or she can't stay here."
>
> And what about the weekend when Hayden is not in daycare, Michelle's
> working, and Jenn is physically exhausted and needs a nap 'cause she has
> to work that night? If Hayden doesn't nap, Jenn can't, and she'll never be
> able to hold up at work?
>
> I'm just asking, in case Jenn wonders how she can deal with these
> situations.
>
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